Shower Blog

How do I introduce myself? Well, I’m a shower. Not in the metaphorical sense that we are all showers, I am a shower. White plaster. But don’t judge me, I’m not racist, I’m down with the brothers. In fact, this spanish dude uses me on a daily basis. When I say “used me,” I mean he uses me. I usually feel like less of a person when he’s done. Imagine my soul as a pepperoni pizza. Every time he showers, a piece of my soul is taken away. Sometimes it’s just a slice of pepperoni, sometimes it’s a whole slice.

Today it was just some cheese. He hopped in me, singing “Happy Birthday” or some shit. It wasn’t long until he was blaring the soundtrack to Rent. Yeah, I have my suspicions about his sexuality. Sometimes when he’s on the toilet, I catch him glancing below my curtain. Who does that?

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